Ladies, listen up – it’s the period product we’ve all been waiting for. And the best part? It was designed by a man. Introducing “Feminine Lipstick” by Mensez, a glue designed to stop your menstrual flow. “Have you ever woken up with your lips stuck together?” reads a post on Mensez’s Facebook page. “It didn’t hurt and it was kind of fun. All you had to do was wet your lips from the inside with saliva and they became unstuck.”
This, friends, is the principle behind Mensez, “a revolutionary, safer solution for women to control their periods, without the need for tampons, pads, vag cups or period panties”. According to the website, “Mensez is a proprietary combination of amino acids and natural oils in a lipstick applicator. When applied to the labia minora, it creates a temporary seal to retain menstrual fluids inside until urination.
“The urine instantly releases the seal and everything washes away into the toilet.” Describing the now patented product as “safe and secure for the user”, the website notes that Mensez is based on the theory of “makeup or oil on a mirror that doesn’t wash off with water alone, but with a window cleaner with ammonium it washes away easily. Urine has ammonium in it naturally and it releases the seal.”
And no, sadly, it’s not #fakenews. The man behind the lipstick, Daniel Dopps, a Kansas chiropractor, told Forbes that he has high aspirations for his product. “It will be hopefully sold to someone like Procter & Gamble or Kimberly Clark,” he said. According to Dopps, the product needs to be “thoroughly tested and improved”, but he stands by its original concept. “It makes more sense than putting the plug up there,” he said, adding, “we’re using the vagina like a bladder just like tampons do.”
Unsurprisingly, Dopps’ idea hasn’t been met with the overwhelming gratitude and excitement he might have been expecting. For a start, many have questioned whether or not Dopps actually understands the difference between a urethra and a vagina. Furthermore, what about the risk of infection? (*Source: stuff.co.nz February 25 2017)
In response to one commenter, Dopps wrote, “[Y]ou as a woman should have come up with a better solution than diapers and plugs, but you didn’t. Reason being women are focused on and distracted by your period 25% of the time, making them far less productive than they could be. Women tend to be far more creative than men, but their periods that [sic] stifle them and play with their heads.” That’s right. Periods stifle our creativity, ladies.